You have played when it’s 35 degrees out.
You take your own putter to play mini golf.
You know who David Leadbetter is.
You can use MOI in a sentence.
All of your pants have a tees in the pockets.
Your one hand is clearly more tan than the other.
You know your last 5 scores but not your moms’s age.
You call in sick on the day your new clubs are to arrive.
You keep your clubs in your trunk at all times “just in case.”
A perfectly manicured lawn gets you more excited than pictures of Cindy Crawford topless.
You have club marks on a ceiling somewhere in your house.
When traveling you’re more excited to see a golf course than unusual wildlife.
You’re known to start swinging your shoulders and pivoting your hips in the middle of conversations.
You go to Hooters once a week “to support John Daly.”
You have played through drenching rain to avoid slower groups.
You’ll practice your swing with anything; a tv remote, a stick in the woods, a broom or your kids’ toys.
You recognize Johnny Miller’s voice and can instantly tune it out like your wife’s.
You’re on every golf retailers catalog mailing list (and actually read them all).
When discussing architecture you mention Ross, Nicklaus, and PB Dye.
There is home video of your golf swing for the purpose of “analyzation.
When someone says its 56 degrees outside you start thinking about your sand wedge.
You know who Sam Woods is and dream of your toddler someday marrying her.
You have said “I am broke, “I never have any time,” and “Do you want to go golfing tomorrow?” all in the same conversation.
You’ve ducked behind a tree when you realize your boss is on the course too.
You can identify the differences between bent, bermuda and poa anna grass.